Mark Musselwhite Arrested for Public Nudity

(Original article dated June 27, 2009 –

This guy right here is from Gainesville, Georgia.  Ah.  Gainesville.  Home of the infamous ‘Runaway Bride’ and several other colorful characters.  Mark Musselwhite.  That’s this guy’s name.  He’s the former Mayor of Gainesville, City Council member, former Deacon of First Baptist Church in Gainesville and…what?  Republican.  A molotov cocktail on legs to be sure.

The cliffnotes of the incident can be read here.  In a nutshell, the man was flat drunk, streaking all over the campground and talking smack about, “I’m very political!”  “Do you know who I am?” ‘I’ve got people!’ (not an actual quote.)  And?  You’re sitting there naked…in a lawn chair…at a campsite…with an unknown woman…a pick-up truck…and a horse trailer.  Claiming you had just been swimming in the creek.  The same creek featured in the movie “Deliverance”.  Yeah.  You’re a stand-up guy alright.  No.  Please.  Don’t stand.  Nevermind.

The arresting officer, Mr. Brandon C. Wall, filed a soon-to-be classic police report, referencing Walmart specifically.  You simply MUST read it in its entirety.

Need I quote the cliches?  Karma.  Chickens comin’ home to roost.  The worm always turns.  What goes around come around.  Whatever the cliche…Mark Musselwhite of Gainesville, Georgia?  You’ve been electronically tattooed.  And THAT is something you’ll never get out from under.


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