The Strand’s Tale

“The Strand’s Tale”

(Written from the perspective of a strand of hair.)

I hate my life.  No, really.  I do.  Ya know, up until recently, things have been okay.  But the past couple of days?  A living hell.  I’d been with Head for…oh, I dunno…like 35 years?  That’s awhile.  I was rather attached.  Things were rolling along without too much drama, then one day…there it was.  A new Head.  Only tiny.  With nothing on it.  And it screamed.  A lot.  Too much for my taste.  Obviously too much for Big Head’s taste too, because she took to not washing me for days.  I smelled .  I felt like I’d been bathed in Crisco and pond water.  The only affection I got was the occasional yank of a ratty hairbrush; but that was minimal at best.  Maybe Little Head was screaming because he had to look at us dirty filthy hairs all day long.  I don’t know.  But it’s a possibility to say the least.

At any rate, as I said, things were clipping along at a fair pace when things suddenly took a down turn.  Big Head started screaming back at Little Head.  Something about, “You make me wanna tear me hair out!”

That’s when I really started to question my mortality.  I mean, was THIS what I wanted to do for the rest of my life?  I noticed some hairs I thought were friends start bailing on the rest of us.  Just fell right out.  But I made up my mind.  I was staying.  So I dug in my root and held on.  I’d been dug in like that for about a week when “The Incident” happened.  Little Head had been at it for days and Big Head was starting to say crazy stuff like she needed a drink and a new husband who made more money to hire some help around here.  But my devotion kept me focused.

Then just like that….it was over.  Yanked me and about 20 of my neighbors smack out of her head and threw us down on the floor.  I’d barely hit the carpet when I saw Little Head making a beeline for us.  I tried to look inconspicuous, to no avail.

Long story short…I’ve now taken up resident AGAINST MY WILL, MIND YOU…in the inner stomach of Little Head.  But you know what?  It’s not too bad!  Button is down here, along with Key, Marble and Wedding Ring.  So…if there’s a moral to this little story, let it be this.

All because you’re SUPPOSED to be in one place because of rules and prettiness…being in a different place sometimes isn’t such a bad thing either. Maybe I don’t hate my life after all!


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