The Redundancy of Depression

I want you to look good and hard at the above picture.  What would you say is going on here?  At first glance, you may say to yourself, “Oh, that’s a malpractice suit waiting to happen.”  Or…”Inappropriate physician behavior.”  I could proceed with a variety of possible scenarios, but WordPress would probably shut me down for inexcusable adult content.

Truth be told, this is the new ad campaign for Abilify.

ABILIFY^® (aripiprazole) is a prescription medicine used to treat depression in adults as an add-on treatment to an antidepressant when an antidepressant alone is not enough.

Okaaay.  So what you’re trying to tell me is:

ABILIFY^® (aripiprazole) is a prescription medicine that we invented to bamboozle the grown folk into believing Pill #1 is inferior and can’t POSSIBLY be effective because we chemically made it that way, unbeknownst to all ya’ll depressed jackasses out there.

Abilify’s original commercials showed middle aged adults slinking around the house in rumpled pajamas, crying over stacks of over-due credit card bills and not feeding the cat for days.  Apparently their demographic research was faulty.  So they put their swollen heads together and came up with a NEW commercial,  more kid-friendly.

So I decided to try a human behavior experiment.  I muted the commercial and made my 5 year old kid watch it, then give me her interpretation.  Here’s what she said:

“What kind of pet is that?  She should’ve bought a cute kitten.  But not a cat like Tess.  Tess is repressed.”

Tess is our cat.  A chronically DEPRESSED cat.  Cali’s interpretation of the word is REPRESSED.  (Is there even a difference?)

So in a round-about way, Cali somehow saw “depression” in that commercial.  Was it an intentional subliminal message or just a coincidence?  I shudder to think.  Either way, I struggle to grasp the intent.  Make meds friendlier?  More approachable?  Less scary?

I’ll tell you what’s scary.  That side-effect guy at the END of the commercial talking 500 mph and the only words you catch are “bloody stool” and “sudden drooling”.

I made a little movie about this very subject that will give you further insight into this new miracle-cure for the dysfunctional anti-depressant.

I give you…..Abilify vs. Cocaine!

Shannon Price: A Different Stroke of Dumb

I realize I’m a few days late on this one, but I wanted to let the dust settle before I began to cast judgement.

Back in 2007, Gary Coleman was walking through the barren wasteland of Utah when he tripped over a rock….and out came Shannon Price, with her scuttling, triflin’ self.  Coleman picked her up, gave her a spit-bath and took her home and made her (legally, even!) his very own.

Okay, that was a lie.  I think they met on a movie-set or something.

“I never got the opportunity to be romantic or feel romantic with anyone,” Coleman said. “I wasn’t saving myself, she just happened to be the one.”   (How very sad for you, Mr. Coleman.)

The couple’s nuptials happened on a mountaintop.  “Nobody was around but the minister, preacher, the videographers, the photographer, the helicopter pilot and us. That was all that was there. There was nobody else.”  (Again…how very sad for you, Mr. Coleman.)

Less than a year later, they were divorced.  But not before making a classy appearance on “Divorce Court” to try to salvage their marital wreckage.  At some point in 2009, the fabulous Shannon Price was arrested for domestic violence.  That’s right.  You heard me.  She put the smack-down on her wee little man.  For shame, woman….for shame.

A bit off the subject…but here’s another odd pic I found.  It looks like a scuffle is taking place and someone jumped out with a camera and surprised them.  Hence, the deer-caught-in-headlights look.  Poor Gary looks like he’s being man-handled…woman-handled…whatever.  He’s being mistreated.

Sadly, Gary Coleman passed away on May 28, 2010 after taking a tumble down some stairs a few days prior.  Now.  Here’s where things get HIGHLY suspicious.  The 911 call made by none other than Ms. Fabulous.  Apparently she’d moved back in the house and they were planning on re-marrying after Gary’s health improved. 

Gary apparently fell down some stairs and suffered a brain hemorrhage, followed by Shannon’s less-than-stellar 911 call.  She told them there was blood everywhere and they’d better speed it up because “I can’t deal”.  Talking about she didn’t want to go down there to check on him because she might seize out.  She probably didn’t want to go down there because she didn’t want the 911 operator to hear Gary say, “Why’d you push me, woman?!”  Two days later she pulled him off life-support…and here we are. 

No one really knows how they’ll react in times of crisis until they actually happen.  But dang….this woman seems a bit “touched”….and not by an angel.  YOU be the judge and jury.  Here’s the call:

The Dangers of Texting and Driving (Warning: Graphic Video)

If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a thousand times.  If you want to get the attention of today’s youth, you’ve got to come at them in an aggressive way.  These kids are so desensitized that if the message isn’t forceful with some sort of shock value, they don’t hear or see it.  I don’t know of one Public Service Announcement in this country that had made a sizable impact on young people. It’s like we want to send a message but don’t want to offend anyone in the process.  Sometimes you HAVE to offend for the greater good.

The United Kingdom seems to understand this concept entirely.  They’ve been bombarded with criticism due to a Public Service Announcement that was aired last year, showing a gruesome car accident that occurred when a car full of young girls were too busy texting to pay attention to the road.  Is the video gruesome?  Yes.  But so are car crashes.  They’re not pretty.  When I saw this video for the first time, I was visibly shaken.  Yeah, it’s that powerful.  It’s vividly stuck with me since I watched it over a year ago.

If my daughter were of driving age, I’d sit her down and make her watch the video too.  If the gruesome image of blood, gristle and bone keeps my daughter safe, then I’m all for it.  YouTube has flagged the video as “Adult Content”, meaning you have to be over 18 to view it.  Kids start driving at 15 years of age.  Therein lies the problem.

I do warn you, this video is harsh but extraordinarily realistic.  I challenge you to sit down and watch it with your teen.  Maybe these images will save their lives down the road.